Thursday, April 5, 2007

A PSA (of sorts)

Last night (or rather, very early this morning) around 1 am, I decided I needed a study snack. I popped some popcorn, drizzled on some garlic butter, and sprinkled it with sea salt.

Delicious, huh?
Yeah, for about 20 minutes.

Then, I got really, really thirsty. So I drank a ton of water. Tons of water with tons of salt. I experienced what is technically referred to as hyperosmolar volume expansion. Translation: I was bloated--really, really bloated. I looked like a snake that just ate a rat. I was so miserable I had a hard time getting to sleep.

This morning, I woke up with three monster "blemishes" on my forehead. Let me tell ya, garlic butter isn't nearly so appetizing when it's erupting from the pores on your face.

Graphic, I know. But it's all for your benefit. You know, like that Don't Do Drugs PSA where the woman takes out her dentures and explains that methamphetamines stole her teeth.

Learn from my mistake.
Eat an apple. (Unless meth already got the best of your teeth.)


dive said...

You have made a difference, Terroni.
This is absolutely true: I was about to stick some popcorn in the microwave after going through some blogs, but EW!
I will make a smoothie instead.
Thanks for the timely advice.

Cheryl said...

So I started thinking, hmmm, love garlic, never had it on popcorn, sounds good. Ended with, OK, don't need to try that. I'll stick with my 94% Fat-free not delicious popcorn.

Maria said...

Actually, I only like caramel popcorn. The idea of garlic popcorn almost makes me feel, well....bloaty. you explode or anything?

Terroni said...

No explosion. I did have to wear elastic waist pants the next day though.
I'm not all that cute to start with (90% nose and ears), add garlic butter zits and elastic waist pants--I don't even think guys in prison would've hit that.

Susanlee said...

ew I do the horrible popcorn bloat thing about once a week. It never sinks in that it could be avoided...My face doesn't usually erupt though, just lucky I guess.

emmapeelDallas said...

LOL! I am laughing out loud here! "...looked like a snake that ate a rat" indeed. Somehow, I doubt that.

From a fellow indulger (is that a word?)...