Wednesday, March 28, 2007

In local news

Last night, I took a break from studying to do one of my very favorite things with one of my very favorite people. I watched the late local news with my roommate. I know what you're thinking, "Who the hell watches the local news for kicks? What are you, 80?"

And I'd say, "That's a stupid question. Eighty-year-olds don't stay up until 11pm." I would also tell you that watching the news with my roommate is great because we always find the exact same things utterly hilarious.

Our favorite moment from last night's broadcast:

Blond perky female anchor says, "Police and rescue personnel were called to 4th street today when a 3 year old was found face down in a water garden. The child was taken to a local hospital, but his condition is still unknown."

What's so funny about a drowning toddler? The anchor, that's what. She delivered the whole story with this huge, goofy smile on her face. Looked like she had just won the lottery. It was as though she didn't understand what she was reading off the teleprompter. (Or, she is some sort of sick psycho who gets off on drowning toddlers.)

Either way, totally inappropriate facial expressions are generally the kind of thing we really enjoy, and we laughed our asses off.

All day today, whenever things weren't going well, one of us would chime in with, "Where's a 3 year old face down in a water garden when you need a pick me up?"

And that is why I love my roommate.
A kindred spirit with a twisted sense of humor.
She makes drowning toddlers fun.


Anonymous said...

I know what you mean. Sometimes our anchors here make bad word choices when they decide to suddenly ad lib, and it comes out all wrong. Or the story changes.

Anchors: Discussing new fashion trends for the summer.

Stylin' Weather dude: Well it certainly is hot down South.

Camera back to suprised Anchors, obviously not sure where to go with that statement.

(Like "down South" as in Texas, or "down South" as in, below you belt line Steve?)

In other news....


Maria said...

I don't mind anchors nearly as much as I mind weather forecasters. They get positively giddy over bad weather and insist on saying things like, "Well, folks, I hope you didn't pack up your shovels just yet!!"

It kind of makes you want to shove that shovel right where it will wipe that smile off their faces....

Cheryl said...

And the network keeps anchors like this because??? Maybe to entertain medical students? That stay up until 11PM? Funny.

I just read all your posts. Impressive. What kind of medicine do you want to do? How long have you been in medical school? How hard is it?

Keep on writing :)

ryan said...

drowning toddlers are hilarious

but isn't everything on the local news
they go into devastating stories
and then
right back into some story about the new park that is opening

its more bipolar that anything i have ever seen

ryan said...

oh and maria
if you are ever in nyc
check out bill evans

so annoying
and he has the worst jokes ever
not funny

he almost makes me want to change the channel
as does sam champions teeth!

ab said...

Have you ever heard Don Henley's "Dirty Laundry"? A nice little musical indictment of TV news, and a catchy tune.

I worked in local news in small, mid and major markets, and it's all generally uniformly bad EVERYWHERE, but especially the small markets. Last week the weather guy crawled out of a plastic colon, complete with polyps, then proceeded to tell us the next day would be sunny. I'm embarrassed for my former profession. I guess I do need a colonoscopy though lol.

emmapeelDallas said...

I have the same reaction to the news. And at the risk of sounding like an incredible curmudgeon, most of the anchors look like hookers, men and women...I miss Walter Cronkite...